From the Shadows to the Stage with Carly Melchert
Carly Melchert is the founder of The Restored Soul, a certified keynote speaker, and one of the original BFDs. She and Leslie connected online during the pandemic, back when Carly was running a nonprofit and hiding every gift she had out of fear it would cost the organization donations. In this episode Carly traces her arc from hidden to headliner: trusting her intuition at every fork, leaving a stable job to bet on herself, and learning the hard way that finding your voice on stage is never a straight line.
In this episode:
- The "accidental" Instagram poll vote that started Carly's whole transformation
- Going from yoga to tarot to Reiki and sound healing, and learning to talk about her gifts out loud
- Why she left a good, rewarding, stable job, and how she helped the people around her feel safe about it
- The keynote that fell apart because the trauma wasn't as healed as she thought
- Her husband's gut-check: "if you're selling something, I'm not buying it, you don't seem safe"
- Doing the deep work in a safe container BEFORE the stage, not on it
- Owning what you share and what stays yours when life keeps happening mid-journey
- The open question of where her voice goes next: podcast, stage, sound baths, group Reiki
- The eagle in her yard, and the unapologetically real version of herself she shows online
Connect with Carly Melchert:
🔮 The Restored Soul
Connect with The BFD Show:
🎓 Apply to be a guest / find your stage: bfdshow.com
📺 Watch the network: watchbfdtv.com
Famous is a frequencyâ„¢.
Transcript
Welcome to the bfd show, hosted by leslie jefferson.
Speaker B:Welcome to the BFD Show.
Speaker B:I'm your host, Leslie Jesperson, and today I am joined by Carly Melchert, who is just a natural, a pro at this point.
Speaker B:And you were one of the first people that I reached out to when I started booking more of these episodes because we have had a journey and the concept of BFD you were present for.
Speaker B:You have the merch.
Speaker B:You are a certified bfd.
Speaker B:So I would like you to introduce yourself to our audience, who you are and what makes you a bfd.
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker A:Hi.
Speaker A:Thank you.
Speaker A:I'm Carly Melchert, and I am the owner and founder of the Restored Soul.
Speaker A:I'm also a certified keynote speaker.
Speaker A:I'm a big fucking deal, because I really let my intuition be my guide.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker A:Was I allowed to use the full word?
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker B:And also, I just have to point out how clear, how concise, how specific, and how simple that was.
Speaker B:It's almost like you had media training.
Speaker A:I know.
Speaker B:So, Carly, you have had a journey that has been beautiful to witness.
Speaker B:When we first met, actually, not even in person, because I feel like we were connected for several years before we met in person.
Speaker B:You're not from Atlantic City.
Speaker B:You're from, like, the.
Speaker B:I don't know why I was going to say the fields, because I do.
Speaker A:I live in the middle of nowhere.
Speaker A:I'm surrounded by fields, lots of land.
Speaker B:And so, anyway, we.
Speaker B:You, like, found me online, which I love when that happens.
Speaker B:And you bought makeup from me, like, over the pandemic back then, which is.
Speaker A:Wild because I'm not a makeup person.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker B:So crazy.
Speaker B:So tell me a little bit about your journey from that point.
Speaker B:Like, where were you at at that point when we first connected compared to, like, where you are now?
Speaker A:Sure.
Speaker A:So I was in a very different role.
Speaker A:I was not working for myself.
Speaker A:I was running a small nonprofit organization and had, like, really put all of my stuff to the side.
Speaker A:Like, it was really pandemic time when we connected.
Speaker A:So my focus was on making sure that that operation didn't fail, and that meant putting all of my stuff to the side.
Speaker A:I also was, like, staying very hidden about things that I had going on, gifts that I have and not wanting to speak out, being afraid that if people knew about some of the things that I did, that they would not give money to the nonprofit that I was working for.
Speaker B:That's so true.
Speaker B:Because when you.
Speaker B:I remember this very specifically, I was posting Instagram stories, like selling flash sessions, like, coaching sessions for starting your own business.
Speaker B:Or growing your business or whatever it was.
Speaker B:And you, like, voted in a poll that you wanted a session.
Speaker B:I was.
Speaker B:And I was just like, hey, I saw that you hit that by accident, but I just wanted to, like, check in.
Speaker A:And you're like, was this a mistake?
Speaker B:You're like, no, it wasn't.
Speaker B:I need to talk to you.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:I was like, no, I actually want a session.
Speaker A:And you were like, for what?
Speaker A:Cool.
Speaker A:I don't know what you do, but great.
Speaker A:That's great.
Speaker A:So I had been teaching yoga, and even that, at that time was not something that was, like, really on anyone's radar because I had stopped teaching.
Speaker A:And after that first session, I had the, you know, start doing tarot.
Speaker A:Start.
Speaker A:Why would I know to ask you for a tarot session?
Speaker A:I don't know that you do that.
Speaker A:So you had told me to start talking about it.
Speaker A:We did a mastermind.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:Yeah, we did a mastermind.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker A:And I just started, like, doing the things that you told me to do.
Speaker A:And I actually can think of the first time that, like, I put a story out there and said, like, hey, I want to start offering tarot to people to bring abundance into my life.
Speaker A:Like, didn't even just, like, say money, but, like, just said abundance.
Speaker A:And somebody reached out right away and was like, hey, I want to have you come to a party at my shop.
Speaker A:And I was like, okay, all right.
Speaker A:I don't know that I was, like, meant that yet.
Speaker A:Like, I don't know that I'm ready to do that.
Speaker A:And, like, just took that chance on myself and, like, slowly allowed myself to begin building my business.
Speaker A:I was, like, sitting in this place of not wanting to work at that job anymore.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:But really, like, not sure where to go, really.
Speaker A:Even feeling safe to bet on myself.
Speaker A:Also, like, making other people in my life feel secure that, like, that stable paycheck would go away.
Speaker A:And so I just was, like, slowly building and then finally left that job to pursue the things that I love and, like, just really fill me up.
Speaker A:The job that I had, it wasn't a bad job, and it was a very rewarding job, but it just was like, this is not really what I want to do anymore, and I'm not giving all of myself to.
Speaker A:To reiki, to yoga, to this aspect.
Speaker A:And, like, I also don't feel like I'm giving all of myself to the job that I'm getting paid for because it's just not like, I'm just like, why am I here?
Speaker A:I want to be there.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker B:It was really hard for you to be present.
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker A:And also, like, at any time, like, when I wasn't doing what I wanted to do, I wasn't thinking about the work I should do.
Speaker A:And then when I was doing the work that I wanted to do, I was like, oh, wait, we need.
Speaker A:We should be doing this as well for the other job.
Speaker A:And then my mom will say that she couldn't wait for me to talk, and then I never shut up.
Speaker A:And I've always felt like I just, like, really wanted to share my voice.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker A:And so I decided to do the speaker training, and I blew you away with that one because you were like, what are you talking about?
Speaker A:You want to become a certified speaker?
Speaker B:I have learned that this is how you operate, because it's just as intuitive as I am.
Speaker B:Like, it's never on my radar that you are about to do something.
Speaker B:You literally joined this.
Speaker B:This program, like, two hours before it started or something.
Speaker B:And I was like, all right, let.
Speaker A:Me send you the link.
Speaker B:Like, what are.
Speaker B:Okay, this is what we're doing.
Speaker B:And I am fucking obsessed with that about you.
Speaker B:Like, because I am very different.
Speaker B:Like, I operate through telling the world obviously what I'm thinking.
Speaker B:I wear my heart on my sleeve.
Speaker B:And you operate very differently.
Speaker B:And what is so beautiful about witnessing you in this journey of sharing that voice is you learned that your story will change.
Speaker B:And speaking on stage, writing a keynote, really getting comfortable with, like, massive visibility and telling your story.
Speaker B:Like, you had to learn, how much of this do I want to share with the public?
Speaker B:And how much of this am I hiding because I'm afraid?
Speaker B:Talk to me a little bit about that experience and that transformation that you had with your own gifts, with your own story, with what happened in the past.
Speaker B:I remember you're like, I had to go back to therapy.
Speaker B:Like, talk about that, because I think people don't understand that it is not a straight line.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:The first.
Speaker A:And when you're writing a keynote, there's obviously going to be versions.
Speaker A:You're going to write a draft, and then it's going to change.
Speaker A:But the keynote that I wrote from the beginning was not anywhere close to the keynote that I ended up delivering, and not because I got up there and just did whatever I wanted.
Speaker A:That's not what we do.
Speaker A:But there were so many things that happened.
Speaker A:So I realized in the beginning that when I was, like, talking about some trauma that I had experienced, when I was, like, trying to practice, I was back to living in that trauma.
Speaker A:Like, it wasn't as healed as I thought.
Speaker B:It was.
Speaker A:And my husband had said to me, he's like, I don't know what your intention is to go down there and do this, but right now, like, if you're selling something, I'm not buying it, because you do not seem okay.
Speaker A:Like, you don't feel safe in what you're saying.
Speaker A:So I went back to therapy to, like, work through it.
Speaker A:And, like, I think I scared the therapist because I had this, like, such powerful session where I, like, moved through so much that I had no expectation that that was going to happen.
Speaker A:And then in the process, like, I became a mother in a different way that was really needed to be, like, part of my story.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker A:Because part of leaving my job was also that, like, I was on this journey to motherhood and needed to take a break.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:Because the journey that I started with and how I'm, like, being a mother today are not the same thing.
Speaker A:They.
Speaker A:They look different.
Speaker A:And I also needed to be able to, like, share about that on stage, share about the grief that I was experiencing and, like, really embodying all of it safely.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker B:And it was.
Speaker B:You were well into the journey when life happened, and I think that's just really important for people to understand.
Speaker B:Like, life is still happening.
Speaker B:As we go through these visibility exercises and the process of embodying the big fucking deal.
Speaker B:And you don't have to hide it or you.
Speaker B:You have control over how you want to incorporate that into your story.
Speaker B:There were things that you just were like, this is.
Speaker B:And I talked about this with Holly, too, who, you know, on her episode, like, we get to have ownership of what we share.
Speaker B:And you did a really incredible job of deciding.
Speaker B:Okay, I've actually been dancing around this, and I need to just say it, and I'm not going to say it for the first time on the fucking stage.
Speaker B:I'm going to do it in a safe space, in a container where I can really feel so that, you know, when your husband is listening to you, he's not like.
Speaker B:Like, for our partners to be able to see that.
Speaker B:And I love that he did that, by the way.
Speaker B:Just, like, reflect that to you is just a really, really beautiful thing.
Speaker B:So I'm really, really fucking proud of you.
Speaker B:Where you're at now, what does that look like?
Speaker A:Hi.
Speaker A:I'm working on deciding, like, what my business looks like.
Speaker A:I started the training, the speaker school training, because I really thought that I wanted to have a podcast, and I have just been, like, toying around with the idea of, like, I'm not a tech person, and Me either.
Speaker B:That's why we're here.
Speaker B:And I don't do any of it.
Speaker A:Yeah, I don't know anything about that.
Speaker A:And so am I, like, biting off things that are too much for me?
Speaker A:Is that the way I should be sharing my voice?
Speaker A:Is that.
Speaker A:Am I being a BFD by, like, doing it behind a screen?
Speaker A:Or am I just supposed to be on stage delivering my keynotes?
Speaker A:So just, like, letting this year kind of like, show me where I'm supposed to go while I'm also continuing to grow and like, expand the work that I'm doing in other ways.
Speaker B:Yeah, that's a really good point of like, okay, I'm sharing my voice.
Speaker B:What is the next step?
Speaker B:Where am I supposed to go from here?
Speaker B:Because we know, like, the keynotes and the big audiences, that's what we train for.
Speaker B:And also you could be sharing your voice in your sound healing sessions.
Speaker B:Like, there's so many different ways that you can continue to share that.
Speaker B:And it doesn't have to be a podcast.
Speaker B:It could be doing things like you're doing right now and just sharing that on other people's platforms as well.
Speaker B:And all of the work that you did kind of led up to you being able to, like, be so versatile.
Speaker B:Like, you can, I'm sure.
Speaker B:And this is me just guessing you weren't freaking out on the drive here,.
Speaker A:Not saying the whole way down.
Speaker B:Right?
Speaker A:Like, someone asked me, oh, what do you.
Speaker A:What do you guys be talking about?
Speaker A:I was like, oh, I don't.
Speaker A:I mean, like my business, but, like, I don't know.
Speaker A:I was like, we're just gonna vibe and it'll just happen.
Speaker A:Leslie's gonna just pitch me and I'll go.
Speaker A:I don't know.
Speaker A:I was like, that's how it's gonna work.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:I would love to see you talking more at your.
Speaker B:Because I attended your sound bath and I know you let the sound do most of the work, but I think you could kind of expand.
Speaker B:This is me just like off the hip.
Speaker B:Like, I think you could expand upon that and share a little bit of your voice in a way that serves those people there.
Speaker B:Just.
Speaker B:Just throwing that out there.
Speaker A:Well, I will be.
Speaker A:So I have a new partnership and I'm bringing more of my group Reiki.
Speaker A:So that is really going to be heavy on me using my voice and my guided meditation skills to do very trauma informed Reiki work with a group setting.
Speaker A:So that way no one has to be touched or feel uncomfortable with me moving around the room.
Speaker A:So I will definitely be using my Voice quite a bit for that.
Speaker B:I love it.
Speaker B:What else do you want people to know about you before we end this episode?
Speaker A:About me?
Speaker B:Because you are so multifaceted.
Speaker B:Um, I love.
Speaker B:You have to follow.
Speaker B:We'll put Carly's information in the show.
Speaker B:Notes you have to follow because Carly's stories.
Speaker B:You're just so authentically yourself.
Speaker B:You're like a homesteading baby wearing.
Speaker B:Yeah, I love it.
Speaker B:It's so outside of my city realm.
Speaker B:Like, when you were.
Speaker B:We were talking about, like, when you were making the decisions, you're like, I saw an eagle in my yard or something.
Speaker A:I'm like, you saw an eagle?
Speaker A:I was like, oh, my God, is that an eagle?
Speaker A:I, like, remember, like, walking, because Leslie and I always communicate through voice note, and I was walking, responding to her, and I was like, oh, my God, is that an eagle?
Speaker A:And I just, like, took off running because it's one of my signs that, like, this is, like, something you're supposed to do.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:It's so funny.
Speaker A:That was, like, so clear to me.
Speaker A:What else do I want people to know?
Speaker B:What is what?
Speaker B:Like, what is your magic?
Speaker B:I know that you.
Speaker B:You've.
Speaker B:You said your intro, but, like.
Speaker B:Yes, let them feel it.
Speaker B:Like, why did.
Speaker B:Why does everybody need Carly?
Speaker A:I think because I have learned to become so comfortable being vulnerable.
Speaker A:Am I wearing a bra on Instagram?
Speaker A:No.
Speaker A:Should I be?
Speaker A:Maybe.
Speaker A:Are you just going to see, like, a very real version of me that does not look like the person with makeup on here?
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker A:You will just see that.
Speaker A:And, like, that's not who I was so many years ago.
Speaker A:So, like, I've gotten really comfortable with that and just, like, showing you, like, the good, the bad, and the.
Speaker A:What in the fuck is she doing now?
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:I love it.
Speaker B:I love it.
Speaker B:Carly Milchert, I adore you.
Speaker B:I love you.
Speaker B:Thank you for being here.
Speaker B:You are one of the OG BFDs.
Speaker A:Thank you.
Speaker A:Thanks for inviting me.
Speaker A:I love you.
Speaker B:Thanks for tuning in.
Speaker B:And make sure you check out all of the notes so you can connect with Carly.
Speaker B:And we will see you next time on the BFD show.
